Sunday, October 19, 2014

Fall Break 2014 II Cosby Campground

Have you been through one of those seasons in life where things, frankly everything, is just completely overwhelming? It’s not necessarily stress, just a sense of unrest. Well, that's where I am over here...

As  I draw closer to graduation, job applications, state boards and the unknown future, life is getting crazy - que relaxing weekend in the woods with my beautiful family! 

Fall break was welcomed this week and we ushered it in with camping and memory making - -

I have a love affair with the mountains. 
I could stay and never leave. 

Even the rain couldn't keep us down - though it would have been nice to be able to enjoy the bonfire! 
We visited Cosby Campground in the Great Smokey Mountains National Park - we had planned a hike but had to reschedule due to the never-ending rain which couldn't be conquered with a toddler in tow. Instead, we hit up the most adorable apple farm and barn to snag some delicious apple treats! Apple fritters, apple pies, apple butter - apple over load!!

Ashley had to go back to school Sunday night but was able to rejoin us Wednesday to make the trip home for HER fall break. 

Monday we found what has to be one of my new favorite short & quick hikes at Tremont Institute - Spruce Flat Falls was gorgeous! We took a few minutes to enjoy the view and munch on an apple. It was the perfect distance and the most beautiful sunny day! 

Enjoy the rich fall colors - it is truly amazing what an iPhone can capture when you forget that you took your memory card out of your camera! 

Tuesday, October 7, 2014

I'm Worn Out

I have been meaning to write a post for a few weeks now and since I decided to take a "mental health" day today - the timing was just right for a little blog session. This semester has been so different from the rest of nursing school - the studying has slowed and my skills have been pushed to a new level. I am ending things out as a student on an Ortho floor - I cannot say that I love it but I have gotten to practice some skills that will be useful in the future. We generally see patients fresh from a joint replacement, spine surgery or ER admits. 72 more hours to go....

I keep telling myself "I can do this" but there is always that seed of doubt somewhere in the back of my mind. It's challenging, it's uncomfortable, some days it's awkward - but I want to be the one to do it. I know I can learn this - so many have gone before me.

I think one reason this rotation has seemed to drag on for me is the atmosphere in which I am working. Often times, people I am surrounded by are negative about..well...just about everything!
I feel the life being sucked out of my hopes and dreams of becoming a nurse. I am entering this profession because I like to care for people, I hate to see someone hurting and I think everyone deserves a kind, compassionate, careful nurse to walk with them through their hospital stay {whether hours or weeks}

Although it may not be listed in the syllabus, I learn one fact more and more each time I step foot into the hospital. I cannot do this on my own strength. I must rely on the Lord, He who is stronger than I. The true healer, comforter and confidant.

Nurses burn out.
Nurses live in an almost constant state of stress - emotionally and physically.

But God remains - He is constant, He is sufficient.

The days are grueling and the stories continually touch my heart, often reminding me of my own family member or friend.

When I return to my car after a long shift and start that 40 minute drive home, my soul is refreshed and renewed by the presence of Jesus. Sometime it's through tearful prayer, sometimes I sing along as praises are lifted up on the radio but often, it is the silence that is most powerful - reflection on what all I have to be thankful for.

68 days stand between me and a diploma with the letters B S N
And 68 forevers will not separate me from the unconditional togetherness of my soul with Christ.  Hallelujah!

"His going out is as sure as the dawn; 
He will come to us as the showers, 
as the spring rains that water the earth."
Hosea 6:3

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